This series is called “My Secret Tortures” and is about a heartbreak suffered at the end of a particularly intense love affair. Functioning perhaps as part catharsis, part journal, and part confession, this collection of illustrations and prose explores the secret rituals I have adopted after the end of the relationship. Each piece combines a small body of text about something I am doing in the aftermath of this loss which is halting or sabotaging my healing. The text is paired with a loose contour illustration in pen and ink wash of a quiet moment or space where these small rituals take place. While each piece is highly personal and specific to my heartache, I’m hoping the feelings that they evoke are relatable. Healing works differently for every person and every relationship. “My Secret Tortures” is a peak behind the curtain at the ways we try to hold on even if we know we need to let go.
The final work is an edition of 20 hand-bound books. Each is printed on archival Moab entrada rag natural 190 lb paper, and stitched with yellow hemp thread. The belly ring is a paper made from twigs, leaves, and cotton fibers. The belly ring covers the title of the book, adding to the meaning of it being “secret” tortures. Each book is hand-numbered and signed. In the inner back cover of each book also includes a single drop of blood, playing with concept of pain and healing.